As human beings, we expect much from another. It starts with our parents. We expect our parents to take care of us now, so that we take care of them later. In the gay world, the biggest paradox is this expectation. Though two people can be physically compatible, the issues arise when one expects the other to financially provide to the other, as a part of the relationship, usually the older one. This is highly influenced by the hetero-normative culture.
But with gay men, I have seen that sometimes it is skewed. It is very hard to perceive what kind of expectations come towards you. One would want you for emotional support, while providing financially. Some look mutuality where they are financially and emotionally independent. Some barter sex for emotional comfort, and some barter financial support for sexual satisfaction (no, I didn't mean the commercials).
The issue begins when the other person has nothing to offer. No emotional connection, no sexual satisfaction nor financial support. But expects all three from the other. As I dated, I realized this to be a blind spot with gay men.
To me, more than anything to be offered mutually, the exclusivity tops the list. But, that isn't the case anymore in the community. A person with a lot of money, spends it on several men with good body. Those with good body sleep with several men for emotional leverage , and the combination goes on.
Expectations are endless, we all want John Abraham as our boyfriend, and even if we get, there will always be a Channing Tatum smiling at us. The key question is, what can you give for someone like that to be your guy (That others cant/wont give)?!
But with gay men, I have seen that sometimes it is skewed. It is very hard to perceive what kind of expectations come towards you. One would want you for emotional support, while providing financially. Some look mutuality where they are financially and emotionally independent. Some barter sex for emotional comfort, and some barter financial support for sexual satisfaction (no, I didn't mean the commercials).
The issue begins when the other person has nothing to offer. No emotional connection, no sexual satisfaction nor financial support. But expects all three from the other. As I dated, I realized this to be a blind spot with gay men.
To me, more than anything to be offered mutually, the exclusivity tops the list. But, that isn't the case anymore in the community. A person with a lot of money, spends it on several men with good body. Those with good body sleep with several men for emotional leverage , and the combination goes on.
Expectations are endless, we all want John Abraham as our boyfriend, and even if we get, there will always be a Channing Tatum smiling at us. The key question is, what can you give for someone like that to be your guy (That others cant/wont give)?!
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