It seemed like he was naive and innocent as I am. May be that is how we see people around us. I would travel for work, and would feel good that there was someone waiting for me in my city to hang out. He had his driving test, the 80 kg boy whom I had to drive around annoyingly, finally was about to get his own ride. didn't think that I was being used. It had happened before, didn;t think it'll happen again...
The time it happened before when was in my college days, sophomore, to be exact. Through my friend, I met the guy who was, to me the ideal human being. Textbook definition of ALPHA male. had his own submissive Beta friend, and a gang that would praise him and show off. His Charm again, I fell for. Had piercing eyes. I must say, the body toned with martial arts and his base tone voice, how he smelled good always and walked macho. May be I do all that now, but I realized that he had been faking it. Sometimes, A closeted gay man goes to a whole new extent to cover up their identity, but it shatters when they see a cute guy. The eyes are a huge give away. The fact that they are uncomfortable around you, and how they behave even more macho, makes you see through them even faster.
The "Good guy" image, and a failed relationship made him look "Straight" to others. But, to me, I knew there was something hidden inside this macho demeanor , and he ran away from it. Mostly, hiding himself behind his homophobic comments, martial arts and wrestling, occasional flirting with girls and the "Beta" men around him praising his masculinity. I took him around when his bike was given for service, I was partially taken for a ride, in turn I was let into his "Beta" group to praise his macho-ism and be a "Wing man". As young as I was, it didn;t feel right, to build walls around yourself and not owning upto oneself wasn't the toughest thing to do, but it wasn't real. I left the group heavy-hearted. For he then hid behind a girl to not be open about his inclination...
Incase of Dobby, I made sure that I don't follow that pattern, I didn't want to be looser. I didn't want play the "Poor me". From then I decided to take things in my own hand instead of being taken for a ride.
The time it happened before when was in my college days, sophomore, to be exact. Through my friend, I met the guy who was, to me the ideal human being. Textbook definition of ALPHA male. had his own submissive Beta friend, and a gang that would praise him and show off. His Charm again, I fell for. Had piercing eyes. I must say, the body toned with martial arts and his base tone voice, how he smelled good always and walked macho. May be I do all that now, but I realized that he had been faking it. Sometimes, A closeted gay man goes to a whole new extent to cover up their identity, but it shatters when they see a cute guy. The eyes are a huge give away. The fact that they are uncomfortable around you, and how they behave even more macho, makes you see through them even faster.
The "Good guy" image, and a failed relationship made him look "Straight" to others. But, to me, I knew there was something hidden inside this macho demeanor , and he ran away from it. Mostly, hiding himself behind his homophobic comments, martial arts and wrestling, occasional flirting with girls and the "Beta" men around him praising his masculinity. I took him around when his bike was given for service, I was partially taken for a ride, in turn I was let into his "Beta" group to praise his macho-ism and be a "Wing man". As young as I was, it didn;t feel right, to build walls around yourself and not owning upto oneself wasn't the toughest thing to do, but it wasn't real. I left the group heavy-hearted. For he then hid behind a girl to not be open about his inclination...
Incase of Dobby, I made sure that I don't follow that pattern, I didn't want to be looser. I didn't want play the "Poor me". From then I decided to take things in my own hand instead of being taken for a ride.
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