The human mind always wants something more than what it got. May be for a potato like me, a handsome hunk like him, who is brilliant and charming, he must be a blessing. And to me, he was too good to be true. Honestly, I thought that he was time passing with me. He wanted to talk to someone and I would make conversations that never ended. When the conversations turned sexual, I would shy away, and if it was for sex, he should have left, but he didn't.
Our conversations were random, most didn't make sense. It was hardly even romantic. For someone who was still not over his childhood ex, He didn't want to use the "L" word. My mind drifted that I would one day be as handsome as, as smart. Even now I look up to him. A charming personality with no ego. Every girl who would see him wishes he was hers. But, the real face, took its time to reveal.
He was smitten by me for my words, and slowly he admired my ideology. My looks, at that point, was tolerable. As a friend of mine who saw his pic told me that I would never be able to look like this "Kashmiri- Punjabi" hybrid. May be being a Mallu, was not so bad. The Hybrid fell for the pure breed, after all. I was glad that he wasn't pretentious. Later on, Something I can only relate now, is that he liked me more than I thought. He would tease, constantly. He would make me jealous. for someone sober and bland in most of the occasions, I actually felt it all. I realized that I was falling for a virtual person, someone I had never met. I broke down, more than once, to him. And his answers were never satisfying. As much as I was in dilemma, I was high on love. The feeling was bitter, yet sweet. It was the first time I actually "Felt" things for a person, in an otherwise static mood of mine. I felt alive! I was in love with his looks, his words, his smile and his eyes. Even when he teases me and I act visibly annoyed, I would be floating in joy and all I wanted was to hold his hands and press my lips against his. I wanted to claim him mine to the world. but wait.. did I mention about his racist brother?
Our conversations were random, most didn't make sense. It was hardly even romantic. For someone who was still not over his childhood ex, He didn't want to use the "L" word. My mind drifted that I would one day be as handsome as, as smart. Even now I look up to him. A charming personality with no ego. Every girl who would see him wishes he was hers. But, the real face, took its time to reveal.
He was smitten by me for my words, and slowly he admired my ideology. My looks, at that point, was tolerable. As a friend of mine who saw his pic told me that I would never be able to look like this "Kashmiri- Punjabi" hybrid. May be being a Mallu, was not so bad. The Hybrid fell for the pure breed, after all. I was glad that he wasn't pretentious. Later on, Something I can only relate now, is that he liked me more than I thought. He would tease, constantly. He would make me jealous. for someone sober and bland in most of the occasions, I actually felt it all. I realized that I was falling for a virtual person, someone I had never met. I broke down, more than once, to him. And his answers were never satisfying. As much as I was in dilemma, I was high on love. The feeling was bitter, yet sweet. It was the first time I actually "Felt" things for a person, in an otherwise static mood of mine. I felt alive! I was in love with his looks, his words, his smile and his eyes. Even when he teases me and I act visibly annoyed, I would be floating in joy and all I wanted was to hold his hands and press my lips against his. I wanted to claim him mine to the world. but wait.. did I mention about his racist brother?
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