Skip to main content

The Death of Conversations

Any of my relationships flourished and thrived in Conversations. Being in a long distant monogamous relationship for a year isn't easy, but I could not have done it myself. Even with all the differences we had, we converse, even as a fight. Getting to know the person happens through this. Knowing about our deeper selves happen through conversations. But, what I lack the most today is just that.

Today, the conversations have died out to "Pics?", "Nudes?", "Type?", "Got place" and yes, sometimes it is pretty frustrating to keep conversations with a lot of people, not leading anywhere. But, now, my whatsapp is barren without those messages. I have those occasional ones from the sites who have good convos, but the underlying contract is that I should fall in love with them, or interested to spend the rest of my life with them. Or else, ciao.

This had happened recently more than ones. I have a good conversation with this person, who read my blog. He shared his, and we ended up chatting for long, until he asked me if I he likes me. I honestly did not feel anything as such, but there was no particular non-liking. But with a bit more probing from him, I had to give a direct no. The conversation ended. After many attempts trying to make one, it ended with the same set of questions, It would have been easy for me to fake in an interest, but somewhere I couldn't lead someone like that. It felt wrong, I felt like I genuinely lost a good friendship. Had I been in his position, may be I would have done the same, or I might have tried to keep the convo going with a small hope of chance.

Another guy, with whom I had a good start, had turned down the convo, knowing that my priorities are different. It felt bad. I don't remember the last time I had a good conversation. May be with a friend of mine, much older to me. Where both of us were simply looking to converse and nothing else. It could be the age.

The same is true with straight people too. Men and women have become so clear that they need something out of the person they converse with. May be its because of "too many options" again. When there are several men/ women who are available for you to talk with, why waste time with one?


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

End of a time

It's been so long since I wrote. But then when I see people read my blog, and say how much they relate. It compels me to write more. I thought that I don't have much to write anymore. Same old issues, same old stories. I even didn't want to write thinking that the issues I mentioned would probably dilute the matter with too many posts. But then I write today because something recently struck me hard. A conversation with a love interest who is looking for a partner, realized that I talked a lot about my previous love .Which I didn't know was so obvious. But I clearly didn't move on. After may be discussing for a whole hour, he asked if I am looking for a lover or a partner? Because you don't have much time until you spend time loving someone who may never be your partner. That's when I realized that I for all these years, haven't had a proper romance, and I am already out of that age. I am old enough to settle down and look for a partner, instead of ...

Being Married

When you really connect with someone who is going to get married and has a fiance, and he says "if only had we met before", isn't something you just take. I was adviced by more than couple of gay friends and Bi friends who said that Gay relationships are not trust worthy, that you should get married and settled down with a girl. At this juncture in life, marriage is a long way to go, yet, those of you who like you, love you and care for you being married or engaged doesn't give a great feeling about it. Things that I feel when a gay guy gets married. Its a Sham - A couple of guys have approached me that I be their "partner", while they are married. I honestly felt bad for the girl. While she exclusively loves him and waits for him to give her attention, he goes around with guys or a guy, to quench his thirst, sexually or otherwise. Being taken for granted - It feels like that one guy is taking the girl for granted, that she deserves only this and no...

The real success?

One of my open friend had shared about his life and its happenings in one of the radio programs and He shared its write up to me. He had been open at the age of sixteen and had gone through many hurdles. Rite now he is around 24, single. Goes to parties every week end and has casual sex. Now there are other guys I know who have been open, and lead the same life style at various ages. But that is when I realized that I do not want a lifestyle like that. It is not him who doesn't want to settle down, but the fact that he is happy with those random guys, in plenty, who flirt with him and want to sleep with him, is a place I wish I never go. I say this not in a judgmental way, but out of care and agony. As I read through the lines, the similar situations were many more. Those guys who have been taunted at school and those who had to come out at a young age. Sexual taken advantage of, and end up accepting that as their fate. They flirt with many, they fall for some, some fall for the...