Skip to main content

Priorities and Initiative

When you fall for someone, you can't help it but make him a priority. You also end up taking initiative to make you are engaged with him. But, those priorities and initiatives don't work if they are not mutual. Many of us end up making someone your priority only to see that you are not their priority at all. That you end up being the person who takes priority on them.

Men especially have many other priorities. Earning for us is not an option but a duty. We need to be "someone" and prove ourselves to people around us, and that consumes most of our time. We cannot live for "someone else", and even if you do, the other person must prioritize more in other things to get your life going. 

Sometimes, the fact that I am getting older makes it all the more complicated. With our own lives to live and works to do, the burden of life only increases day by day. The guys who were elder to me, have so many responsibilities, that they can look at you as an "escape", and wouldn't take the romance seriously. But that is life!

We all wish that we could live in with our loved ones. We wish we could spend more time, that we could travel more often, and live well. That your guy had more time for you, and took a bit more initiative.

When someone is in love with you, you would end up being their first priority and they become yours. They are the first thing you think of when you wake up and the last thing you think of when you sleep. You would do things for that one person which you wouldn't do for anyone else.

But as day goes by you only see that we keep ourselves engaged with various things and interests. Especially if you are with someone who is in a distant relationship with you, and if timelines don't match, and more over when the responses get delayed, the attention goes down, it creates a void, and we end up making something or someone else your priority. 


Popular posts from this blog

End of a time

It's been so long since I wrote. But then when I see people read my blog, and say how much they relate. It compels me to write more. I thought that I don't have much to write anymore. Same old issues, same old stories. I even didn't want to write thinking that the issues I mentioned would probably dilute the matter with too many posts. But then I write today because something recently struck me hard. A conversation with a love interest who is looking for a partner, realized that I talked a lot about my previous love .Which I didn't know was so obvious. But I clearly didn't move on. After may be discussing for a whole hour, he asked if I am looking for a lover or a partner? Because you don't have much time until you spend time loving someone who may never be your partner. That's when I realized that I for all these years, haven't had a proper romance, and I am already out of that age. I am old enough to settle down and look for a partner, instead of

Walk of Shame

usually walk of shame happens when you have had sex with a total stranger, and you just regret to have done that while getting back home in the morning. But, to me it was different. Some few months back, I met this guy, he was really smart. well behaved and very talented. Mind you, I didn't meet him on any apps, but for work. Everytime he comes to work, he gives special attention to me, while other men "see", he "watches" me. While other man just touch, he "feels" me. He used to openly make it clear that he is there to see me and me only. I used to feel so special. But I never had the guts to reciprocate. Partly because the reputation he has for being a player. he is extremely smart, very soft spoken and has that charm. Girls fall for him so easy. I used act like I don't like him, but all my peers started noticing the attention I get from him. He talks only to me, the way he looks at me, how closely he stands, how he gets pissed if I have a figh

What I would tell my young gay self

Sometimes when you are gay, you are isolated, there are no mentors to guide you what is right and what is wrong. You have to tread carefully and move forward. With all the experience that I have gained so far, I would have to see what is gonna work and what doesn't. A few things that I would want to tell my younger self if I were to meet him. 1) They are as scared as you are - I remember the days when I used to ask a hundred questions before I share my photos. I was worried that I would be blackmailed, that I would be raped, and that the guys would kidnap and sell me off. Yes, all this does happen. There are many who are really evil, but as time went, I realized that most of the guys are just helpless and are scared themselves. There are many married men who live a double life, there are famous men, who don't want to come out, there are young boys who are going through the same as you. In fact, some of them are more closed than you are! 2) You would be rejected - Rej