Skip to main content

Close the crowd

The biggest barrier is the fact that there are so many options. our search for the perfect guy never ends. For someone who has gone through countless profiles to see if it clicks, I was disappointed. But at least I moved on. There are two types of clinging. Some cling to one person they like and crave for intimacy, and then there are those who cling to several men. May be I belong to the former and Dobby, the later. I think its better to find a middle point, that I strive to strike.

Leaving the social networking sites (occasionally used to promote the blog), was the best thing I had done. I chose a very few set of people who respect me the way I like, and those who really wished to keep in contact, and I wished to keep in contact, I left the rest of the options. I could say now that, when the time is right, you'll find the people you want anyway. Now I spend my time to understanding the people around me deeply. To make conversations that give me clarity. To be mindful about the vibes around me. And have my fair share of silly play.

When I do find the guy, I am sure I'll not have much to keep away. The least I can do is to be make it is easy for him to accept me with all my flaws. May be that's what we need to invoke. The hope for acceptance, for the sake of intimacy. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

End of a time

It's been so long since I wrote. But then when I see people read my blog, and say how much they relate. It compels me to write more. I thought that I don't have much to write anymore. Same old issues, same old stories. I even didn't want to write thinking that the issues I mentioned would probably dilute the matter with too many posts. But then I write today because something recently struck me hard. A conversation with a love interest who is looking for a partner, realized that I talked a lot about my previous love .Which I didn't know was so obvious. But I clearly didn't move on. After may be discussing for a whole hour, he asked if I am looking for a lover or a partner? Because you don't have much time until you spend time loving someone who may never be your partner. That's when I realized that I for all these years, haven't had a proper romance, and I am already out of that age. I am old enough to settle down and look for a partner, instead of

Walk of Shame

usually walk of shame happens when you have had sex with a total stranger, and you just regret to have done that while getting back home in the morning. But, to me it was different. Some few months back, I met this guy, he was really smart. well behaved and very talented. Mind you, I didn't meet him on any apps, but for work. Everytime he comes to work, he gives special attention to me, while other men "see", he "watches" me. While other man just touch, he "feels" me. He used to openly make it clear that he is there to see me and me only. I used to feel so special. But I never had the guts to reciprocate. Partly because the reputation he has for being a player. he is extremely smart, very soft spoken and has that charm. Girls fall for him so easy. I used act like I don't like him, but all my peers started noticing the attention I get from him. He talks only to me, the way he looks at me, how closely he stands, how he gets pissed if I have a figh

What I would tell my young gay self

Sometimes when you are gay, you are isolated, there are no mentors to guide you what is right and what is wrong. You have to tread carefully and move forward. With all the experience that I have gained so far, I would have to see what is gonna work and what doesn't. A few things that I would want to tell my younger self if I were to meet him. 1) They are as scared as you are - I remember the days when I used to ask a hundred questions before I share my photos. I was worried that I would be blackmailed, that I would be raped, and that the guys would kidnap and sell me off. Yes, all this does happen. There are many who are really evil, but as time went, I realized that most of the guys are just helpless and are scared themselves. There are many married men who live a double life, there are famous men, who don't want to come out, there are young boys who are going through the same as you. In fact, some of them are more closed than you are! 2) You would be rejected - Rej