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The core of why gay men are promiscuous and polygamous is because the essence of romance has gone down, or was never the priority. Since the generation before hardly had any men being okay with romancing another guy, except in the name of friendship. It didn't make sense for men to "be in love" with another man, except for sex.

The Taboo of romance is still high, where men would rather not kiss, hold hands and cuddle. In fact, when you do something even slightly romantic, men either run away, don't/ can't reciprocate, or get overly attached. Not that I have not done all the three. In fact, while dating Kel I felt all the three in stages. My first instinct when a guy approached me with romance was the fact that I was skeptic. Why would a handsome guy like him come behind an average Joe like me?! but when the attention continued I realized that I didn't know how to reciprocate. I was pretty much stuck. When he asks for a kiss, I would freeze. There was a feeling deep down that all this is temporary, that he'll one day have a girl, he would do all that he did to me, to her. and then when he sort of distanced himself, I got overly attached. I would ask him why he has become distanced and I couldn't understand at that point.

Now roles reversed I feel that I can understand him too well. Romance is much more intimate than sex, a lot more intimate than friends with benefits. But what could be stopping could be more than the taboo, but the fear of intimacy itself. Kel had spoiled me for the many, with his undivided attention to me, and the best part was that I didn't mind.

The feeling of mutuality is hard to find, those who you like, likes someone else and you don't like those who like you. Not that straight relationships don't have the issue. But romance happens in its true essense only when you see a life, a future with the other person. Atleast for me. When you love and take efforts to romance a guy, I don't think there will be time for others. 


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